I could feel the excitement when I told him we were expecting our first child but it was nothing compared to the Joy he exuded when he held his Son in his arms for the first time. I saw the twinkle in his eyes "The first sign of my strength" He would say.
Why was it so special? Asides the fact that the miracle of the birth of a child is always so special, My Husband had never thought this was going to happen, He got married a little later than most people in his age group when he least expected it and about a year later found out he was going to have a baby. It was surreal which made him all the more grateful for the blessing of a beautiful boy. While I was busy thinking I wasn't quite ready to be a Mum, He was over the moon and making fun of me.
It's been 3 months!
When we got home from the hospital, Our new baby woke up every 2 hours to feed what we did was at night the would be a bottle of expressed milk and whoever woke up first would feed him. I would nurse him if I woke up first or my husband would give him a bottle if he woke up first. It was a working arrangement for the first 2 - 3 weeks but then life started happening, knowing that my husband has worked all day and sometimes night, I would let him sleep and like that I started doing all the night feedings. This also spilled over being the primary care-giver, I did most of everything and my husband only carried him and played with him when he got back from work. I didn't see anything wrong with it until one day, I was EXHAUSTED and I made it a Daddy and Son day. I figured at the end of the day, the only reason why our baby is so attached to me is because I feed him, so I expressed milk enough to last him till evening and I just had a slow, sleepy day. On this day, My Husband did everything and I watched on the sidelines occasionally supporting when it was absolutely necessary. It occurred to me that in my attempt of being a considerate wife by shielding my husband from the day-to-day stress so he can attend to other things, I have deprived him of the bonding experience it brings.
I have seen my Husband in his different responsibilities, as Boss, Husband, Friend, Mentor but nothing is as delightful to watch as him being a Father. Over the past few weeks, I have seen their bond grow stronger, I have seen a more goofy husband - I will blame all the children songs they are both watching - and also seen that he actually enjoys being so involved in everything with regards to our son.
Already, I am the party pooper that doesn't allow them watch tv together because it's not appropriate for a baby. I can already tell that I would be a 3rd wheel if I am not very careful and I don't mind at all, it brings me so much joy to watch them grow in Love with each other. I am grateful for a Husband that made the decision to be involved and I know that without a shadow of doubt that He has our back.
I am learning everyday to resist the urge to do everything myself and let him do what he enjoys doing.
Happy Father's Day!
Why was it so special? Asides the fact that the miracle of the birth of a child is always so special, My Husband had never thought this was going to happen, He got married a little later than most people in his age group when he least expected it and about a year later found out he was going to have a baby. It was surreal which made him all the more grateful for the blessing of a beautiful boy. While I was busy thinking I wasn't quite ready to be a Mum, He was over the moon and making fun of me.
It's been 3 months!
When we got home from the hospital, Our new baby woke up every 2 hours to feed what we did was at night the would be a bottle of expressed milk and whoever woke up first would feed him. I would nurse him if I woke up first or my husband would give him a bottle if he woke up first. It was a working arrangement for the first 2 - 3 weeks but then life started happening, knowing that my husband has worked all day and sometimes night, I would let him sleep and like that I started doing all the night feedings. This also spilled over being the primary care-giver, I did most of everything and my husband only carried him and played with him when he got back from work. I didn't see anything wrong with it until one day, I was EXHAUSTED and I made it a Daddy and Son day. I figured at the end of the day, the only reason why our baby is so attached to me is because I feed him, so I expressed milk enough to last him till evening and I just had a slow, sleepy day. On this day, My Husband did everything and I watched on the sidelines occasionally supporting when it was absolutely necessary. It occurred to me that in my attempt of being a considerate wife by shielding my husband from the day-to-day stress so he can attend to other things, I have deprived him of the bonding experience it brings.
I have seen my Husband in his different responsibilities, as Boss, Husband, Friend, Mentor but nothing is as delightful to watch as him being a Father. Over the past few weeks, I have seen their bond grow stronger, I have seen a more goofy husband - I will blame all the children songs they are both watching - and also seen that he actually enjoys being so involved in everything with regards to our son.
Already, I am the party pooper that doesn't allow them watch tv together because it's not appropriate for a baby. I can already tell that I would be a 3rd wheel if I am not very careful and I don't mind at all, it brings me so much joy to watch them grow in Love with each other. I am grateful for a Husband that made the decision to be involved and I know that without a shadow of doubt that He has our back.
I am learning everyday to resist the urge to do everything myself and let him do what he enjoys doing.
Happy Father's Day!
This is so beautiful. I like that you don't mind being the third wheel and that you really care about your husband bonding with the baby. I see love written all over. May your love blossom always.❤
ReplyDeleteAmen! Thanks alot dear
DeleteWhat a great piece! Isn't it amazing to see our partners also become parents? It is a HUGE transition, but having a strong person by your side makes a difference. I hope your love continues to flourish for each other and your little.
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing to watch and follow the transition. I am glad I get to experience it.
DeleteIt is great that your husband was able to bond with the baby. My husband was able to take 6 weeks off of work for baby bonding time. It was great as both of us was getting acclimated with being parents.
ReplyDeleteThose initial weeks are very important... the support is definitely needed
DeleteSo sweet. I love to watch mine as a father too. It is just such a different experience. My husband took the first 9 weeks of her life off and it has been amazing to watch ever since. He loves her like no other
ReplyDeleteIt is indeed beautiful to watch.
DeleteIn full agreement with this experience! Dads are not babysitters and it is so very important that we highlight dads that are truly involved with parenting, not as "helping" with parenting. Great post!!
ReplyDeleteI totally agree, they are not babysitters and should be involved.
DeleteSo heartfelt <3 I enjoyed reading this! You're so right about how when we try and do it all, and think we're being thoughtful, it often deprives dad of bonding! Not only that, but often times, dads are left clueless when mom really needs a break, because they haven't really had to care for baby's necessities, just the fun stuff. Great post!
ReplyDeleteexactly! They tend to have no clue about what it entails.
DeleteAwwwwww... This, is truly beautiful.
ReplyDeletebecauseibelieveblog.com
Thanks Ruth
DeleteBlessings.....
ReplyDeletethis is a good lesson to learn early. to share all the responsibilities together. Otherwise my sistah it is the crack that would break seems in the marriage as the one who shoulders all the responsibility begins to get resentful and angry because they are exhausted and feel less loved and appreciated. Koodos to you